"I think we can all admit that sexual behavior is somewhat related to boredom."
Umm... no. I won't admit that. If I'm having sex, it's because I have an innate desire for the person I'm having it with and she reciprocates. It is not because we have nothing better to do.
I do see people say they're bored and want sex since they have nothing better to do, but that just doesn't make any sense to me. I'm not saying I'm in the majority, but think a little before ascribing a lack of imagination to everyone.
Great article. I think there are a couple of additional points to consider.
1) hypergamy - which is the hypothesis that females desire males with greater than or equal status as themselves. Males desire females who have less than or equal status as themselves. It's understandable if you consider the generalization that males innate drive is to protect and provide, females is nurturing, caregiving and social connections. Considering this, as 60-65% of college grads are female today, the pool of eligible males shrink.
I find it ironic that when the disparity of males to females was the opposite, the reason given by feminists was sexism. Since the disparity has flipped, the reason given is that females are smarter or have the obstacles removed. The reasons are of course multifaceted. Such as the push to get females into STEM by high school counselors encouragement, preferences in admissions, female only scholarships, employer recruitment and Title IX. This has a tremendous impact.
2) females who attend college are negatively influenced by the social sciences, such as women studies, queer studies etc. to resent males as victimizers. College campuses appear to be hostile to males. Also, males are seen as competitors in intimate relationships. My comments are focused primarily on females because they are the gatekeepers of sex.
This doesn't bode well for sexual relationships between males & females. Nor for the nuclear family, which is apparently where the most consistent and higher frequency sexual encounters occur. It goes without saying that this is a serious dilemma for society as a whole.
So... trying to think of how to keep this tactful, but, here goes: as a gay agnostic in an open relationship, I'm intrigued by the smartphone conclusion. If anything, my partner and I use our smartphones to find *more* sexual partners and have more sex as a result (EDIT: And I don't think we have any less sex, just the two of us, together, as a result). And that includes conventional social media, texting, etc. as much as it does dating/hookup apps. I imagine this is true for most single gay men (or gay men in an open relationship) that I know as well. Even the least... well, let's say "sex positive"... of my gay friends has probably had 6 or more partners in the last 12 months?
Are we an anomaly? Is this just a straight issue? Perhaps women or even straight women specifically are more inclined to use social media preferentially over having sex? Not trying to "blame" women - but obviously if we're talking about men who have sex with men vs. straight folks - well, not a lot of women on one side of that equation.
Not trying to make this a conversation about morality (sorry, but not sorry - and probably not interested), though gay men admittedly have very different standards/ideas of "normal". My point is "we're too busy entertaining ourselves with technology/social media to have sex" seems like an odd conclusion to someone who uses that same technology to have more sex. What exactly is going on with straight folks that's different from gay folks?
As a parent of a Toddler, I wonder what the impact of having children has on these. Do comparable age groups that have children report less sex than without?
I think the distraction hypothesis is likely to explain at least some portion of the decline for married couples. In 1989 a lot of people didn't have cable, and maybe had a handful of VHS's. So there was not much to watch on a night to night basis. Now you can watch endless amounts of Netflix and by the time you're done you're tired and ready to go to sleep.
Fiirst off, I'm coming late to this posting....that kind of week...sigh...so other's may have brought up the points I'm bringing up....that said: .
Seems to me that there are a couple of reasons for the lack of people having sex that got overlooked in this very informative/enlightening posting.
1. People in their 20s-40s (i.e. those said to be most sexually active) used to have their own dwellings/abodes. Not the case for a huge number of 20-40s today....lack of privacy kills sex drive in this situation.
2. Multigenerational households are probably also a reason that everyone isn't having sex...but not for the reason cited above, rather for the fact that people are stressed out with regard to EVERYTHING....and sex doesn't thrive in that kind of situation/atmosphere.
3. And then there is the issue (noted in a previous posting) of being able to find a "suitable" sex partner. Ture, as a male friend told me back in college, re: set, all cats are black in the dark. But finding the cat is usually done in full light.
Also, RE: What do you mean about "farming clicks"? That phrase blew right by me.
Also, I loved Children of Men. And you didn't do a spoiler about the ending...so I'm doing it here: It's not a permanent "condition." (And I gotta admit, I really wondered about what had caused the lack of babies).
I am very curious, and I mean very curious.... I'm curious to see if the increase in men and women consuming pornography, is a contributing factor that correlates to of less sexual activity. In the Porn phenomenon conducting in 2015 through Barna, a staggering 4.6 BILLION hours of phonography was streamed from ONE site in 2016 alone! Again I am curious to see if there is a connection.
I tend to over think things...and, since I'd been reading about the huge increase in multi-generational families (due to lack of affordable housing on all levels) and lack of sex in other places I'd already been thinking about WHY.
Had to backtrack to see why you sent this....and am very thankful/grateful that you did. As I said in my other posting, I'll definitely e reading this soon.
"I think we can all admit that sexual behavior is somewhat related to boredom."
Umm... no. I won't admit that. If I'm having sex, it's because I have an innate desire for the person I'm having it with and she reciprocates. It is not because we have nothing better to do.
I do see people say they're bored and want sex since they have nothing better to do, but that just doesn't make any sense to me. I'm not saying I'm in the majority, but think a little before ascribing a lack of imagination to everyone.
Great article. I think there are a couple of additional points to consider.
1) hypergamy - which is the hypothesis that females desire males with greater than or equal status as themselves. Males desire females who have less than or equal status as themselves. It's understandable if you consider the generalization that males innate drive is to protect and provide, females is nurturing, caregiving and social connections. Considering this, as 60-65% of college grads are female today, the pool of eligible males shrink.
I find it ironic that when the disparity of males to females was the opposite, the reason given by feminists was sexism. Since the disparity has flipped, the reason given is that females are smarter or have the obstacles removed. The reasons are of course multifaceted. Such as the push to get females into STEM by high school counselors encouragement, preferences in admissions, female only scholarships, employer recruitment and Title IX. This has a tremendous impact.
2) females who attend college are negatively influenced by the social sciences, such as women studies, queer studies etc. to resent males as victimizers. College campuses appear to be hostile to males. Also, males are seen as competitors in intimate relationships. My comments are focused primarily on females because they are the gatekeepers of sex.
This doesn't bode well for sexual relationships between males & females. Nor for the nuclear family, which is apparently where the most consistent and higher frequency sexual encounters occur. It goes without saying that this is a serious dilemma for society as a whole.
So... trying to think of how to keep this tactful, but, here goes: as a gay agnostic in an open relationship, I'm intrigued by the smartphone conclusion. If anything, my partner and I use our smartphones to find *more* sexual partners and have more sex as a result (EDIT: And I don't think we have any less sex, just the two of us, together, as a result). And that includes conventional social media, texting, etc. as much as it does dating/hookup apps. I imagine this is true for most single gay men (or gay men in an open relationship) that I know as well. Even the least... well, let's say "sex positive"... of my gay friends has probably had 6 or more partners in the last 12 months?
Are we an anomaly? Is this just a straight issue? Perhaps women or even straight women specifically are more inclined to use social media preferentially over having sex? Not trying to "blame" women - but obviously if we're talking about men who have sex with men vs. straight folks - well, not a lot of women on one side of that equation.
Not trying to make this a conversation about morality (sorry, but not sorry - and probably not interested), though gay men admittedly have very different standards/ideas of "normal". My point is "we're too busy entertaining ourselves with technology/social media to have sex" seems like an odd conclusion to someone who uses that same technology to have more sex. What exactly is going on with straight folks that's different from gay folks?
I must be part of the “problem” because I don’t see why any of this even IS a problem. 🤷🏼♂️
As a parent of a Toddler, I wonder what the impact of having children has on these. Do comparable age groups that have children report less sex than without?
I think the distraction hypothesis is likely to explain at least some portion of the decline for married couples. In 1989 a lot of people didn't have cable, and maybe had a handful of VHS's. So there was not much to watch on a night to night basis. Now you can watch endless amounts of Netflix and by the time you're done you're tired and ready to go to sleep.
Fiirst off, I'm coming late to this posting....that kind of week...sigh...so other's may have brought up the points I'm bringing up....that said: .
Seems to me that there are a couple of reasons for the lack of people having sex that got overlooked in this very informative/enlightening posting.
1. People in their 20s-40s (i.e. those said to be most sexually active) used to have their own dwellings/abodes. Not the case for a huge number of 20-40s today....lack of privacy kills sex drive in this situation.
2. Multigenerational households are probably also a reason that everyone isn't having sex...but not for the reason cited above, rather for the fact that people are stressed out with regard to EVERYTHING....and sex doesn't thrive in that kind of situation/atmosphere.
3. And then there is the issue (noted in a previous posting) of being able to find a "suitable" sex partner. Ture, as a male friend told me back in college, re: set, all cats are black in the dark. But finding the cat is usually done in full light.
Also, RE: What do you mean about "farming clicks"? That phrase blew right by me.
Also, I loved Children of Men. And you didn't do a spoiler about the ending...so I'm doing it here: It's not a permanent "condition." (And I gotta admit, I really wondered about what had caused the lack of babies).
Well, when you aren't even sure of the gender of the person you want to be with, it can be a little off-putting, don't you think?
I wonder if it has to do with the uptake of SSRI medications, which can hinder libido.
Our evangelical work here is done.
I find it hard to believe that the easy availability of pornography is not mentioned.
I am very curious, and I mean very curious.... I'm curious to see if the increase in men and women consuming pornography, is a contributing factor that correlates to of less sexual activity. In the Porn phenomenon conducting in 2015 through Barna, a staggering 4.6 BILLION hours of phonography was streamed from ONE site in 2016 alone! Again I am curious to see if there is a connection.
I tend to over think things...and, since I'd been reading about the huge increase in multi-generational families (due to lack of affordable housing on all levels) and lack of sex in other places I'd already been thinking about WHY.
replace "having sex" with "having a relationship" and what the post author wanted to say becomes much clearer, i.e.:
"if I find smartphones more interesting or less risky, troubling etc.. than a relationship, I'll do without relationships, including the sex part"
(whether that's right or not is another issue)
Your "married" graph is very close. I bet those confidence intervals overlap. And the lines for unmarried cross.
I would say your data shows that marriage pretty much accounts for it.
Had to backtrack to see why you sent this....and am very thankful/grateful that you did. As I said in my other posting, I'll definitely e reading this soon.